Ok so not rrreeaaallly a hiatus...

Ok..so I was on SL for awhile yesterday but all for good reason.

As part of my graduation project I want to create a decent machinima to present with elements of my own animation in it. Both animations for SL and animation edited in afterwards using flash and after effects. I need to get on SL to grabs some nice shots of the house to show in a presentation which I had today. I'm sorry if I did ignore anyone last night (I know a couple im'd me) but I really just wanted to get on with the work.

I learnt from my friend Michelle who is an awesome machinima maker the best way to get smoother camera shots. I will be investing in a PC joystick or a PC Xbox 360 controller which in a way sounds logical.

I wish I had a wide screen monitor to record better shots. Hmm..maybe I can thieve one from my dad. I also need to look into rendering these are a higher quality.

Anyway. Here is a couple of the shots I got yesterday. Some of the house and Tel posing and some shots of a sweet little music box Tel has.

Hiatus

As of pretty much tomorrow I will be taking a hiatus from SL. Nothing to do with SL but more to do with my RL. It has taken a rather massive blow this weekend and I'm currently trying to get my thoughts and values sorted out over it.

Tel and I are still awesome as always and he continues to be as an amazing friend in RL as he is an amazing bf in SL.I thank him muchly for the patients and support he has given me over this difficult period. I have still to send a note to my boss at CI and PJ has been awesome as well about me not being able to DJ for the next few weeks.

My mind is all over the place at the moment and I really need the final piece of strength and will power I have to finish my work ready for graduation. It's so easy to disappear into a fantasy world and I don't want that happening to me. This blog as well will take a hiatus as I won't have any SL stuff to update on.

If I do log on it will be to grab notices and check ims. If you do need to get in contact with me just send me an im or notecard and I will get back to you when I can.

Take care everyone and I will see you on the other side.

D x

I just wanna fuckin dance!

Title inspired by this song lol



But there is a point to it lol. I got myself a job at Club Industry this week working as one of their new dancers. I'll be working Tuesdays and Wednesday from 4pm til 7pm SLT. Wednesday I got some training from MarinJenn on how to work the stage pads and what needs to be done during my shift, including greetings and promotions. I start next Tuesday so pretty excited :D

I was also offered the chance to become a blogger for the Menswear blog but I'm really not that clued up on the lastest fashions in SL and I don't have enough lindens to my name to buy all the latest fashions. I spend most of my SL time topless or naked anyway. It would of been a great opportunity but I had to say no. I don't think I'm what they are looking for.

But I still like making my own fashion. Including this winning t-shirt I made last night :D

And now for today's D'aaaawwww picture before I finish. Pedro sniffing Murdoc's butt and Sebby going "eeewww!"

I could take pictures of these lil bastards all day :3

Club Industry Footage

I was able to get a few of us on my dance chim last night and we looked totally awesome like some bad boy band backing dancers. It's hard being this cool you know! Anyway, I took some footage of us and around Club Industry to get some practice in for shooting and editing. I kind of wish I had more footage to fill it up a lil bit. That and my camera pans weren't so wonky. Anyway..enjoy!

Better then a rezday party.

Yesterday was my first rezday as Derren. I've never celebrated a rezday before and when you're on your second avie in almost three years it starts to lose a little meaning. But I'm glad I've lasted as Derren this long and hope there are many years to come :)

I've wanted to do something for the relief efforts that are going on in Japan at the moment. This seemed like the perfect chance to do something being that it was my night to DJ at Spankies. So held an event to raise money, a L$700 prize for best Japanese inspired outfit and all tips going to the cause. Of course everyone was insanely generous and at the end of three hours we had raised L$10,489 which comes to about $42. I was really moved by everyone's' generosity and made for a much more fulfilling rezday.

Thank you again to everyone who came and donated their lindens :D

My outfit...always classy :P

The donation jar!

I did however return to the homestead to find Tel had bought me a rezday present. I think I only really told him and Cat. I felt kind of bad because I didn't get anything for his rezday. Which I didn't forget I just didn't know :| As I said before I've never really seen rezdays as that big a deal. He bought me two really cute music boxes. One that is the same as the one from Labyrinth that I can hold and another that fits perfectly with the other ones in the music room and I love them both! There's something so delicate and magical about them. Plus I had an old bear when I was a baby that played "twinkle twinkle little star" in the same sort of music box sound that is always very comforting to me. 

All in all it was the best rez day I've ever had :D 

Saving Pedro

I logged in yesterday to find Tel had finally given in and had bought a cute little pet of his own. He argues that he didn't cave in because he didn't buy a cat. Instead he bought a cute little Chihuahua and named him Pedro.

Of course I did loud squeeing and arm flails in RL but don't tell him that. Only as I had just logged in, Tel had to go sort out some stuff in RL and said he would be back soon. We hugged as Pedro gave me evils by my ankles and Tel poofed off into RL. 

I sat for a moment and watched Pedro play with the kitties. I think there's some sort of love triangle happening between the three of them. Pedro likes Sebby but Sebby likes Murdoc but Murdoc likes Pedro. Oh their complicated little lives. As I was watching them I noticed Pedro suddenly hoovering in the air and slowly going up. Sometimes they do do these stupidly big flying jumps to get to certain locations but he just kept moving up and up and up. Soon my cats started following him and I waited for a moment to see if they would come down. Nothing...I waited a lil longer...nothing. I went inside to see if it was just a glitch....nothing. I whooshed myself into the air and found my two cats floating at about 500 meters up. I took them back into my inventory and plopped them back on the ground. They seem to be fine now and ran about and played like usual. But what about Pedro. Tel had only just gotten this dog and now he had vanished. You do get replacement for your pets if anything does happen to them but I didn't want Tel to think the pets were glitchy or worse that I had done something to him :O

I whooshed back into the air and hunted for Pedro a second time. It was only till I got to round about the 1300 meter mark that I found this tiny little dot running in mid air. It was Pedro. I clamped hold of him in build mode. The easiest thing probably to do then was to return him to Tel to put down again once he returned. Instead I decided to delicately move him all the way down back to the ground where he would be safe. Hoping that he wouldn't pop back into the air as soon as I stopped moving him.  He didn't thank god and he spent the remaining time barking at me and giving me evils. Ungrateful little shit!

Eating with the kitties. Murdoc's loving it!

Even the laws of gravity can't stop Pedro giving me evils.

Sebby asking "What should we do with him Dad?"

*Squish*

Sebby giving him a kiss :3

And finally a happy family photo. :D

Updates

Been awhile since I've updated but really not much to talk about over the last few days. After finishing the garden I've been sort of forcing myself not to start any new projects so I can concentrate on my school work. now I have some how been able to weasel my Second Life into my school work which I think is going to be pretty fun. I'll explain this in more detail once I've got more to show.

Was shocking to hear about the earthquake in Japan this morning and the aftermath that is still causing much destruction. Good that Japan are well prepared for this kind of thing and is always inspiring to see how calm and quick responsive they are. Makes me embarrassed over the tiny amount of snow we had over Christmas and how our whole freaking country came to a stand still! Thoughts go out to those affect by the disaster and hoping for a safe return to a few friends who are currently out there.

I finally got another product onto *Dead Chuffed*. Back on Manny I tried my hand at static poses for photography and actually made a set I got prepared for selling. It never happened but I moved them onto Derren and now are finally up for sale!

I need to start adding some not so girly products. But I think women are more likely to scroll through MP and look for deals unlike most men. I say "most" men because I'm a sucker for searching for deals on MP and I know Tel is prone to it too.

Cass asked me to take a picture of me and her for a profile. I don't class myself a photographer because I don't have the creative talent for lighting and I have basic photoshop skills. But it's still a fun thing to work with. I'd love to get some more edited pictures of all my friends and more of me and Tel. 

However time inworld has been pretty limited for both of us. Always lots happening in RL and we grab any chances we can get. The house and sim is pretty much finished besides from a little more furniture upstairs. I was able to make a couple more things including these plants on the top floor landing.

We've set a date for the wedding. Keep your diaries open for Thursday 26th of May. Not sure what time but that will be decided closer the time and invites will be sent out. The reason for such a far away dates is because I don't want the stress of my university work ruining the day. Plus both Tel and I will be quite busy at the beginning of May for different reasons or events. We both want a good amount of time to plan and arrange everything to make sure it's a wonderful day. I've never been married in SL or RL so this is all a first for me. Besides from the lack of time together I have no worries for Tel and I. I'm not use to being this comfortable in a relationship lol. Feels good :)

Garden!

The garden is pretty much finished now. I'm sure I'll be making tweeks here and there and buying some statues and such when I have more lindens. But till then here is my own little touch (192 prims lol ) to our homestead :)

View from the back balcony. Looks awesome facing the sunset.

Front

My first proper built object finished. It's a little disjointed in places but I'm still pretty proud of it.

Two little birdies on the fountain.They move and tweet. 

I've called them Vic and Bob after two of my favorite comedians.

Thanks to the textures and prims Tel gave me I was able to make all the plants myself. 

The trees are the only things I didn't make but got them off Market Place for free!

My favourite thing in the garden. The chair swing. Got it from {What Next}and come with single sits and couple cuddles. We re-textured the cushions though as they were a bit girly.

Just chillaxing :3

The bench on the opposite side of the garden. From Kabuki Creations and comes with single and couple poses and different textures.

Garden arch from Bridgets Pets and Outdoor

Finished! Now to enjoy it :D

Am I ready to forgive or forget?

March always seems to always put a spring in my step and a shudder down my spine both at the same time. For one it's nearly spring. Days are getting longer and sunnier, flowers start to come out and there's greenery everywhere. There's also that clean crisp smell in the air that fills my tummy with butterflies.
The shuddering point is that it's almost my birthday.I'll be 26 this year and though I usually enjoy myself in some sort of drunken way it's the thinking up towards that that gets me thinking "What am I'm doing with my life?!". But I'm sure everyone gets that.

Round about this time last year though things started going downhill in my SL. Even when we make a conscious effort to avoid it, drama will always get us somehow. No matter how little or big it seems to us it always happens. And this probably seems like the best time to write about seeing as only about an hour ago I was sent yet another FB message from the person in question.

I use to have an SL brother. His name was Callum.

Back before Derren was even a thought in my mind my primary avie was Manny.  I met Callum when he first started back in November 2008. We became friends pretty quickly and had a laugh but a few months later he quite bluntly refused my friendship due to me apparently bitching behind a friends back. I thought unfair but if that was how he wanted to play it fine, blocked him and carried on with my SL. At the end of the day we weren't really that close at that time.

Fast forward to October 2009. I get an im from someone called My (I'm not saying full avie names). It was Callum again. Saying he was sorry and that he wanted to be friends again. I am the sort (after awhile) to forgive and forget plus my SL had been getting rather lonely so we became fast friends again.

Those times back when everything was pretty cool were awesome. We had a right laugh. Both him and his friend jerico (aka Zod) became like brothers to me. Droobie who was dating Cal at the time was a really fun girl to be around and I had my lady Izzie at the time too. We had the little hiccup of drama now and then, and now I fully know why drama follows Callum like the plague. We fought against the Australian Hells Angels, we quoted our favourite french gangster boss of SL Wasad, we laughed as he become some ghetto mami's baby daddy and I felt part of a family.

Callum joined an RP sim called Crack Den which was an dark, urban, gangster type sim and soon Trin joined out family. Though reluctant at first because of her RL situations, Trin started dating Cal and our little gang had a right laugh. Both Zod and I joined Crack Den as a family, Cal and Zod being my younger brothers while Trin was our half sister. We had a great time creating the stories and our backgrounds. Trin really helped me out with starting out to RP as I had never done it before. With her playing my half sister I got to spend a lot of time with her and over time...I started getting feelings for her. But of course she was dating Cal so kept my feelings shut away. I never even once thought of telling them of my feelings let alone try to get between the two of them. That was never my thing and they were happy together. Something that I would never want to break up. Callum on the other hand seem to do that by himself.

Alexis, another friend who I don't talk to any more,came into our lives once she was constantly bitching about her SL husband. This was the girl I was "bitching behind her back" about when Callum and I first called off our friendship. Basically she's a bit of a sad case. Since I had known her she had been SL married at least 5 times, not including the "forever loves" she had in-between and she was still a few months younger then me SL wise. And though Callum was quite happy to agree on these facts I was still bitching. A fair few of us have these kinds of people in our lives and yes we do bitch about them to other people. It probably isn't the nicest trait in a person but most of us do it. Especially to people who just come to you when no-one else will talk to them. But I digress. She was having problems with her current husband and we started inviting her over to hang with us so she wouldn't be so lonely. Within a few days she had dumped her husband, moved onto the plot next to Callum and started rezzing prim babies in his house. That was creepy enough. All this while he was still dating Trin. Not going into too much detail but their relationship was pretty much 'you can do whoever you want, as long as you don't tell me'. Being that Trin didn't want to have sexual relations on SL due to her RL situations but Cal was still the randy little sod he had always been. Unfortunately this open relationship didn't work out when it all came into the open that Cal and Alexis had been doing stuff together and not telling anyone. Alexis couldn't take the sharing any longer and proceed to send Trin notecards, ims and photos of her and Cal together! Seriously! That's how bat shit crazy that chick is. I stupidly plonked myself right in the middle of the situation, hearing out everyone's side of the story. Trin couldn't take the intensity of the situation and ended things with Callum. Alexis told me that Callum didn't want to tell me about they secret affair due to him thinking I may of had feelings for Trin. When we talked man to man I did admit I had feelings for Trin but would never think of ruining anything they had (as I said he did that by himself). He was fine with this...for about and hour...then the shit started flying. He called me everything under the sun from scum to a c**t. Saying that I had betrayed him and that I should fuck off. Though I had stood by his side through all that shit and shit from before this is how he treated me. As the minutes ticked on the lies started coming out worse. He said that everyone hated me, was scared of me, that everyone thought I was scum. I said my own hateful words in the heat of the moment but only when apologises weren't cutting any ice with him. He said I had no-one even though I was still talking to Trin and Droobie at the time. That I still have Trin on my friends list and still talk to her from time to time. The lies were coming out so thick and fast it almost became a joke! 

I had created Derren by the time and was spending more and more time on him. The last time I went online as Manny he said some ugly things about my personal life. Not only that but with some little cheerleaders in the back ground egging him on. He had become nothing but pathetic and a waste of space to me by then. I blocked him on everything and decided never to talk to him again.

Since then he's probably messaged me about 4 times. Asking for forgiveness, asking that *I APOLOGIZE* to him and that he misses me. But in the end all I miss is two things. One, I miss the fun we had. Those times were great and some of the best memories I have of my Second Life. And two, I miss Manny. Derren's 1st rezday is about two weeks away and though I'm so happy with my life as Derren at the moment I can't help but feel bad for Manny. Cal pretty much ruined Manny for me. Sounds petty but I'm pretty sure a few of us have been through that situation before. 

So..this new message I got today on FB..lets see. It seems from the heart. If I forgive him I still can't be his friend any more. That trust is long gone. But instead of blocking him I might just tell him that we can't be friends again. No matter what betrayal or hurt he felt over the situation it couldn't of been so bad to treat me the way he did. We were the lads, we were best friends and we were family. Not any more. I have a new life now, new family and new hope. I'm not prepared to throw that all away by bringing the drama king himself back into my life.

This song pretty much came out about the time this all happened. Stupidly fitting. Life has a way of doing that.